I was told this week by hung that my previous blog was too long, that i essentially always word things up too much. well here's the abbreviated version of this week's blog just for you hung:
things are lookin bad for me. but i'm still going to kick your sorry ass.
------- hung, this is where you stop reading because the following requires an actual attention span longer than a.... a.... something.
A. i'm down fellas. I've never in any league started off 0-3, and here i am, sitting at 0-3. It didn't look good for me all through sunday, and i don't think i ever had the lead at any point. I'm not at that point where i want to pull my hair out, but my scalp is definitely getting itchy. Like i said before, the benchmark for a playoff bound team with early season impotence is 0-4 set by TheRapist himself, eric chen. So, i have some time before i go completely nuts.
2. I mean comeon! I drafted Deuce Macallister as a backup in case one of my two stud backs got hurt. i ended up trading him while high as hell. This week after Jackson fell to an injury, I was put in a situation where i had nothing to start at RB. I had to pick up Sam "third string" GADO. The only thing that makes this somewhat less painful is the fact that Deuce is out with a season ending injury. That's how fucked up my FF season has been going. Had i kept them both, they both would be uselss to me, because they both got hurt the same week, and i would have had to start Sam "still third string" GADO. FACK.
%. While at the stuff pizza, trying to watch the game through Hung's loud and drunken commentaries about everything, we reached an agreement of sorts on the shit talking allowed and not allowed in our league. Since so much of this league is based on no actual money, all we have is shit talk, but like any arena of combat, there must be rules. We decided that from here on out, there will be no more threats, and badmouthing of anyone's family. FAMILY is off limits. that's just it. We call this the sammy rule. Since family is near and dear to all of us, and since most fights start that way, and since we're no longer fucking 9 years old, we don't need to resort to that, and should just stay clear away. For the betterment of the league.
34. The type of shit talking that is allowed, and encouraged is:
1. RACE 2. TEAM affiliation 3. Albert 4. sexual orientation (we call this the khai rule) 5. dead coaches 6. bush 7. bad teams. 6. dumb trades 7. hung
r. This might make me sound like a bad person but after accepting that I would be at 0-3, i was secretly cheering for Jaymin's team to lose. I just didn't want to be the only team at 0-3, and, Jaymin, i can honestly say, u r my only friend right now. Please don't ever leave me by actually winning a game either.
#. still reading hung? what was the point of my abbreviated blog again? oh yeah. to remind u that i'm still going to Kick your sorry ass. I don't care if my team is 0-3. I still got enough to put together a team that's going to run u over. Getting over confident aren't u? thinking ur 2-1 start is the result of smart management? no bitach, it's just stupid luck. yeah, i know i'm 0-3, i don't care. i'm still talkin shit. i'm going to beat you like you were 6 years old bringing home a report card with a "B+". it's going to hurt losing to a loser hung. it's going to hurt.
Standing:
1,khai (2-1)
2.eric (2-1)
3.hon (2-1)
4.mike (2-1)
5.david (2-1)
6.hung (2-1)
7.albert (2-1)
8.sammy (1-2)
9.me (0-3)
10.jaymin (0-3)
VIAGRA's longest man of the week: Bill Walsh waza Cunt / 109.35 inches
Wednesday, September 26, 2007
Monday, September 17, 2007
Week 2 (second lost)
Da second week as come and gone, and I am now 0-2. O and 2! I haven't started off o-2 in six years of playing fantasy football. Last week, it was albert who gave me my first lost, this week, it was eric, or more commonly known as, da diddy himself. Losing to albert hurts, but losing to eric is like losing to a long standing rival. See, i've known eric since middle school, and since then, we have competed in everything from basketball to pingpong to vodka drinking, so the historical weight of our matchup last week wasn't lost on me. It was: cal vs stanford, michigan vs ohio state, florida vs florida state, (ironically, despite the anology, we both attended colleges that did not have football programs.)
I came up on the short end this time, but like any heated rival, i shall be back.
It was hard sitting there watching da game and knowing that i had very little chance to win. And while Eric, hong, and Hung were disecting all the different things i could have done or do to make my team better, I kept telling myself not to press the panic button just yet. Because after all, this is a young season, and my team was built for the long haul. I told myself this throughout the day, but at night, while driving my way back home, and deciding that I needed to stop at Khai for a quick smoke, I ended up trading Carson Palmer for Randy Moss.
It was a tough decision, anyone that knows me, knows that I just do not trade. Especially, a guy that has been on my team for three years now, a guy that i picked up, and was heavily critized for because at the time he was an unproven quarterback on a bad team. I'm sure i'm going to get heavily critized again for this trade, but while I was high this was my rationale for the trade:
A. Carson Palmer is white, and Randy Moss is black.
B. Randy Moss is a freakish talent who has a Hall of Frame qb now in Tom Brady. [many people think brady spread the ball around to much for any wr to be in elite statistical status, but the way i see it is, Brady finds the open guy, and moss can still get open. Also, spreading the ball around will sustain more drives, and give moss more td opportunities]
C. I had another young qb that i drafted early this year that received many head scratches. That guy was vince young, and granted he can't give me the points that Palmer will give Khai, he might be just good enough to give me close to 17-20 points a game (see his 178, 1td, 58, and no int stat line). It might just be stupid to put ur faith in such an unproven qb, but hey, I never claim i was being smart about this.
D. I haven't made any trades in the last couple of years, because i was always afraid i would get burn. But, what is there to burn? It's not really my player, we're not really playing for money. And trades made the league more fun. Even if i do get burn, so what, it's only friendly bullshit i have to listen to for the next year, and I can live with that.
E. The diddy factor. I remembered eric telling me that I should trade Palmer after his 6td performance. "sell him high," i believed he said. Now wheather, he was just saying that to get palmer from me, or if it was actual advice, i don't know. Kept coming back into my head, sell high. Just didn't think, i would be selling so soon.
F. The CY factor. Moss, for all his lackluster plays the last couple of years, finally has a chance to play great, win a superbowl, and oh yeah, get paid. That's right, it's CONTRACT YEAR for moss, so, the motivation is there for him to play hurt, play hard, and help out fantasy owners like me.
So that was the deal, moss for palmer, and I took it for all those reasons. I still have seond thoughts about it, and something inside me wants to call everybody up and beg em to cancel the trade, go ride the guys i drafted into a championship, but maybe this year, i'll just follow the motto i have set for my own life, and "just go", and not look back. who cares about the possible regrets, when you got a murky future to enjoy. no crying, no hating, just straight working for it.
week 2 standings:
eric
khai
david
hon
mike
hung
albert
me
sam
jaymin
sidenote: Through the miracle of internet advertising, on our league page (and i'm sure everyone else who uses yahoo.com), there's a little blue box that highlights this week's top scoring team. This blue box is brought to us by VIAGRA. It's Viagra "high" score of the week. This week Viagra presents TheRapist(eric) as the week's top scorer. How's that for irony.
I came up on the short end this time, but like any heated rival, i shall be back.
It was hard sitting there watching da game and knowing that i had very little chance to win. And while Eric, hong, and Hung were disecting all the different things i could have done or do to make my team better, I kept telling myself not to press the panic button just yet. Because after all, this is a young season, and my team was built for the long haul. I told myself this throughout the day, but at night, while driving my way back home, and deciding that I needed to stop at Khai for a quick smoke, I ended up trading Carson Palmer for Randy Moss.
It was a tough decision, anyone that knows me, knows that I just do not trade. Especially, a guy that has been on my team for three years now, a guy that i picked up, and was heavily critized for because at the time he was an unproven quarterback on a bad team. I'm sure i'm going to get heavily critized again for this trade, but while I was high this was my rationale for the trade:
A. Carson Palmer is white, and Randy Moss is black.
B. Randy Moss is a freakish talent who has a Hall of Frame qb now in Tom Brady. [many people think brady spread the ball around to much for any wr to be in elite statistical status, but the way i see it is, Brady finds the open guy, and moss can still get open. Also, spreading the ball around will sustain more drives, and give moss more td opportunities]
C. I had another young qb that i drafted early this year that received many head scratches. That guy was vince young, and granted he can't give me the points that Palmer will give Khai, he might be just good enough to give me close to 17-20 points a game (see his 178, 1td, 58, and no int stat line). It might just be stupid to put ur faith in such an unproven qb, but hey, I never claim i was being smart about this.
D. I haven't made any trades in the last couple of years, because i was always afraid i would get burn. But, what is there to burn? It's not really my player, we're not really playing for money. And trades made the league more fun. Even if i do get burn, so what, it's only friendly bullshit i have to listen to for the next year, and I can live with that.
E. The diddy factor. I remembered eric telling me that I should trade Palmer after his 6td performance. "sell him high," i believed he said. Now wheather, he was just saying that to get palmer from me, or if it was actual advice, i don't know. Kept coming back into my head, sell high. Just didn't think, i would be selling so soon.
F. The CY factor. Moss, for all his lackluster plays the last couple of years, finally has a chance to play great, win a superbowl, and oh yeah, get paid. That's right, it's CONTRACT YEAR for moss, so, the motivation is there for him to play hurt, play hard, and help out fantasy owners like me.
So that was the deal, moss for palmer, and I took it for all those reasons. I still have seond thoughts about it, and something inside me wants to call everybody up and beg em to cancel the trade, go ride the guys i drafted into a championship, but maybe this year, i'll just follow the motto i have set for my own life, and "just go", and not look back. who cares about the possible regrets, when you got a murky future to enjoy. no crying, no hating, just straight working for it.
week 2 standings:
eric
khai
david
hon
mike
hung
albert
me
sam
jaymin
sidenote: Through the miracle of internet advertising, on our league page (and i'm sure everyone else who uses yahoo.com), there's a little blue box that highlights this week's top scoring team. This blue box is brought to us by VIAGRA. It's Viagra "high" score of the week. This week Viagra presents TheRapist(eric) as the week's top scorer. How's that for irony.
Monday, September 10, 2007
week 1
so the first week of the fantasy football season is over, and i was humilated in 87-47 lost. for those reading this, and don't have understanding of fantasy football, think of it as stocks, only instead of using the market, we use real human beings. In the market, a compnay performs well, and the value of your stock goes up, and u can cash out with some loot. In fantasy football, a player performs well, and the score goes up, and you can cash in at the end of the season by forcing ur friends to pay up. For some leagues, it's easy for the winner to get his prize at the end of the season, for other leagues, it's damn near impossible.
I have decided to blog weekly about this league i'm in, where we basically play for nothing.First off, this league consists of 10 players, including myself. The players (in no particular order) are: Tony, Mike, Khai, Eric, Hung, Hon, Albert, Jaymin, David and Sammy.
Together, our league is simply known as the Far East League.This past week, I lost big to Albert, and so i don't feel like blogging to extensively about it. Lets just say, it stings alot. It's just hard to lose to this guy, he's simply the perenial bottom feeder of this group. Nothing wanting to sound like a poor sport, i will give no excuse for my lost (but i had an unlucky day, don't we all?). I'm not too worried about it, because well, I built my team for the long haul, and the season is just one week old, check in next week as i either rebound emotionally, or fall deeper into a state of panick, loathing, fear, and agnst.
Keep reading, and perhaps at the end of the season, you'll realize why this league plays for basically nothing.I plan:to find a wr. because mine sucks!!! Two of my staring wrs combined for a total of zero points. that's two stocks i invested in that i can now sell for absolutely no money.I hope:this past week was my last 47 point week. that, it can only get better from here on out.
Weekly standing:
1. Hon
2. david,
3. khai,
4. Eric
5. Albert
6. Hung
7. mike
8. me
9. sam
10. jaymin
I have decided to blog weekly about this league i'm in, where we basically play for nothing.First off, this league consists of 10 players, including myself. The players (in no particular order) are: Tony, Mike, Khai, Eric, Hung, Hon, Albert, Jaymin, David and Sammy.
Together, our league is simply known as the Far East League.This past week, I lost big to Albert, and so i don't feel like blogging to extensively about it. Lets just say, it stings alot. It's just hard to lose to this guy, he's simply the perenial bottom feeder of this group. Nothing wanting to sound like a poor sport, i will give no excuse for my lost (but i had an unlucky day, don't we all?). I'm not too worried about it, because well, I built my team for the long haul, and the season is just one week old, check in next week as i either rebound emotionally, or fall deeper into a state of panick, loathing, fear, and agnst.
Keep reading, and perhaps at the end of the season, you'll realize why this league plays for basically nothing.I plan:to find a wr. because mine sucks!!! Two of my staring wrs combined for a total of zero points. that's two stocks i invested in that i can now sell for absolutely no money.I hope:this past week was my last 47 point week. that, it can only get better from here on out.
Weekly standing:
1. Hon
2. david,
3. khai,
4. Eric
5. Albert
6. Hung
7. mike
8. me
9. sam
10. jaymin
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